I'm back from the dead.

So, life got a little hectic the past few months as you can see by my lack of blogging.  I still intend to finish my year long goal to answer the 60 blog questions I mentioned back in January.  Since getting out of school last Thursday, I have packed up my classroom (oh, by the way, did I mention I got a new job and will be teaching at a different school next year?) and headed up to Scout Camp.  Not working there this summer, just volunteering this week.
FIRST TANGENT
I love cub scouts.  Eight and Nine year old boys are the cutest.  I seriously want one some day.  I just adore them.  Okay, well some are a little pouty and a little whiny, but some of them are so spunky and fun and others are just so sweet and lovable.  I also want kids someday that are like the youth staff they have this year at camp. Today was our first day with cubs and it was a little crazy, everything we do is outside and it was pouring down rain this morning.  By lunch time it was so crazy that our staff didn't get to meet together and sing and say grace before we ate.  Emma (15) reminded us that we hadn't blessed our food and the 4 of us at our table in a sea of cub scouts and leaders bowed our heads while Emma prayed.  It just made me smile and hope that I have a daughter like her some day.
SECOND TANGENT
Suffering is a topic that has been on my mind.  Reading some things written on some other blogs and just something I've pondered this year as it has been a particularly challenging one for me.  We know that suffering is a part of life.  Some of life's difficulties last seconds or days or weeks while other hard times last months or years.  To try and quantify or categorize someone's suffering is difficult.  The types of pain we experience are varied.  All of these pains and sufferings are understood by the Savior.  Relief from our suffering ultimately comes from Him (it can be via other people).  I would add that relief is rarely immediate and that is when humility is developed.  I have a hard time when someone tells me or another person, "cheer up, snap out it, get over it, don't worry be happy".  People who say these things mean well, and sometimes that's exactly what I need to hear.  Other times, I need to suffer for a little bit (or a long time) to develop humility and to realize that I can experience peace even during times of pain and suffering and trial.  It's hard to watch other people suffer, we want to fix it and somehow find the right things to tell them to make it better but are we robbing them of the opportunity to develop greater humility and experience the peace of the atonement?  Don't ask me how the people of Alma submitted CHEERFULLY and with patience to all the will of the Lord.  Mosiah 24:15 (this is something my mission president once pointed out to me).  I don't know that life is always cheerful and peppy and upbeat.  I don't know if God expects anyone to put on a happy face and pretend to be cheerful when they are suffering.  I do know that God expects to have hope despite our suffering.  I believe that real hope is manifest through optimism, patience and persistence.  So maybe faking a smile and pretending to be optimistic (when we have nothing in our reserves) couldn't hurt?  Sometimes I don't even realize the moment when my forced optimism tranforms into genuine hope.
THIRD TANGENT
When I walk around the beautiful neighborhood where I live, I see these gorgeous homes.  They are charming and lovely and quaint and just seem to emanate goodness.  The thought occurred to me today that just because the house on the outside is beautiful and lovely and charming, doesn't mean the family on the inside is just as quaint.  I realized that even though these homes on the inside might be perfectly decorated and homey doesn't mean that the people living inside feel at home.  I've always said that I want my home to be a place where my family wants to be and I'm realizing that has a lot less to do with the caliber of my decorating skills or how fancy and expensive the furnishings are, and a lot more to do with the person that I am.  We don't enjoy being in homes because of the bells and whistles they might boast, we enjoy being in homes because of the goodness of the people that are there.